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Editing Felix Francis Fitzgerald

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{{Worldbuilders}} {{Infobox character|image=felixv2.png.png|caption="I may be a fool and a liar, but I'm an intelligent fool and a truthful liar."|birthDate=Unknown|birthPlace=Unknown|species=Warforged|gender=Unknown|height=5'9"|weight=25lb}}
{{Infobox character|image=felixv2.png.png|caption="I may be a fool and a liar, but I'm an intelligent fool and a truthful liar."|birthDate=Unknown|birthPlace=Unknown|species=Warforged|gender=Unknown|height=5'9"|weight=25lb}}


The first thing that you need to know about Felix is that '''nobody knows anything about Felix.'''  
The first thing that you need to know about Felix is that '''nobody knows anything about Felix.'''  
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* Felix wears thigh-highs underneath his armor.
* Felix wears thigh-highs underneath his armor.
* Felix's entire existence is just one big exercise in strategic ambiguity.
* Felix's entire existence is just one big exercise in strategic ambiguity.
*Felix's entire existence is just one big exercise in nominative determinism.
* Felix killed racism.
* Felix killed racism.
* After killing racism, Felix reinvented racism just so he could kill it again.  
* After killing racism, Felix reinvented racism just so he could kill it again.  
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*Felix is actually just Dr. Moss.
*Felix is actually just Dr. Moss.
* Felix could kick your ass in Mario Kart Double Dash.  
* Felix could kick your ass in Mario Kart Double Dash.  
* Felix owns his own media company.
* I am Felix, this is a lie.
*I am Felix, this is a lie.


Just to name a few.   
Just to name a few.   
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==== Sabbatical ====
==== Sabbatical ====
And where Sir Yewvane is sour and Reedy is bitter, Sabbatical is overtly toxic.  
And where Yewvane is sour and Reedy is bitter, Sabbatical is overtly toxic.  


Sabbatical is a curious individual that I have only met twice. In a one-on-one conversation, she and I had a nice little chat about the facts of what this company has been up to before I arrived. We also had a brief discussion of stories and philosophy. Regrettably, however, I hadn't the chance to tell her a story. Specifically, I recall telling her two things of import. The first, of course, is that the truth is whatever makes you happy. The second was the tragedy of how some people spend so much of their time searching for the facts in the story of life that they forget to extrapolate the truths from those facts. She seems to intuitively understand that there is some wisdom to these two statements on their own. Despite this (and despite her background as a lawyer), she seems incapable of connecting the two together.  
Sabbatical is a curious individual that I have only met twice. In a one-on-one conversation, she and I had a nice little chat about the facts of what this company has been up to before I arrived. We also had a brief discussion of stories and philosophy. Regrettably, however, I hadn't the chance to tell her a story. Specifically, I recall telling her two things of import. The first, of course, is that the truth is whatever makes you happy. The second was the tragedy of how some people spend so much of their time searching for the facts in the story of life that they forget to extrapolate the truths from those facts. She seems to intuitively understand that there is some wisdom to these two statements on their own. Despite this (and despite her background as a lawyer), she seems incapable of connecting the two together.  
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I have a couple individuals on my wait list at the moment.  
I have a couple individuals on my wait list at the moment.  


* David
* Sneeze
*Sneeze
* Paris Hilton
* Paris Hilton


=== Notes on my Supportive Role in the Company ===
Here, I shall document my participation in the ongoing auxiliary tasks occurring at the company that are not directly part of its primary objectives.
==== 1. Amusa's not Got much Talent left, it seems ====
My debut task was aiding with a recruiting campaign. I do sincerely regret being involved in a recruitment effort the day after a person is killed, and especially without getting the opportunity to attend the funeral. But I don't do funerals well. I do not like pretending to mourn. It either makes people upset at me, detracts from the memory of the dead, or, most commonly, both. That being said, I had no knowledge that someone would die the moment before it recruitment.
===== The Position of Captain, and the Murder of Hawthorne Voss =====
There was one stand-out candidate for captain. Hawthorne Voss had several years experience as a captain of sea vessels, and served as an advisory role for airship crews before. He was charismatic, friendly, outgoing, experienced... everything that one could want in a captain. He was perfect.
Or at least he was perfect until he was murdered in cold blood while we were away. I do not name murderers; their names deserve to be forgotten, especially for a killing as spiteful as this one. But, for the sake of description, it was an elf that had worked under the late Hawthorne Voss before who was now seeking a promotion. The murderer was thoroughly and swiftly brought to justice by one Nassir Tycho with a grapple and a summary snap of the neck. Needless to say, Nassir prefers the kind of pacification that one does not ever arise from when dealing with murderers. I cannot say that I blame him, but such a position and method lacks refinement.
The other provided candidates were a blind quadriplegic, an octopus that insisted that everyone should lose their trousers (and removed Chrysaor's forcefully on one occasion), and Snoot.
Our decision for captain was unorthodox. It was actually one of the people in the running for first mate. An individual by the name of Tiki-Ti, who communicates telepathically, was the man for the job in the absence of a more suitable candidate. Tiki-Ti is an honest-to-the-stars statesman. The fact that he put himself in the running for first mate indicates wisdom enough to know his place, but still shows that he hasn't lost his aspirations quite yet. He has the ability to think on the fly, and knows how to incentivize individuals to reconcile their interests with accomplishing a broader objective. I would wager a guess that he was a skilled statesman in his time. There is no doubt in my mind that he will serve at the pleasure of the crew. Finally, he has the build and character of a warrior. He shall thrive here once he develops a closer relationship with his crew, make no mistake of that. That being said, he would have been a prime fit for a first mate.
It took a bit of persuasion for both Tiki-Ti and the person in charge of overseeing the airships to come on board with the idea of shifting his role, but it is an excellent thing that we did. Amaris's sending was vital in ensuring that this process was swift and efficient. Note to self: learn sending. It can save a lot of hassle.
===== The Position of First Mate =====
By my plumes, an honest-to-the-stars statesman put himself in the running for first mate. Sure, he may not know much about ships, but the kid knows what he's doing a hell of a lot more than anyone else did in that company that was alive at the end of it, that's for sure. Perhaps he knows his place. Out of a desire to not make a puppet of his superior, he was made captain.
At the request of Captain Tiki-Ti, the chosen candidate was one by the name of Polly. She was our second choice for first mate before the murder took place, so that all works out excellently, I suppose. That being said, there is still room for worry. I worry that they will be able to be manipulated by other crew members with food, since that is their primary motivator. But, at the very least, the chef will cause no trouble in this regard, since he is a kind man with a pure soul.
Another noteworthy individual that applied for first mate was [[Rome Holiday]]. He appears to hate Paris Hilton, and is primarily motivated by coin. He only wants this job because his father wants to give him a sizeable inheritance, but only on the condition that he gets a job first. [[Rome Holiday]] was hired as crewperson.
Other notable applicants include Snoot.
===== The Position of Engineer =====
David was the only real choice for the role of engineer. His wife left him, took the kids, took his home, likely also took most of his belongings knowing how things like this tend to go, somewhere along the way he was also fired from his job, and then, to top it all off, he was robbed by orphans. Had I a heart, it would most certainly go out to him. He was in a rough spot in his life. He was so down, in fact, that I had to give him a spontaneous therapy session during the recruitment process. Knowing this company, not much about that will change. We hired him as the engineer (the only unanimous decision other than the late first choice for captain, might I add), and his eyes lit up immediately upon hearing this. He still probably needs therapy, and I intend to provide this to him at the earliest opportunity. I expect him to find a new family here, perhaps in Klerica and in Snoot. It would be good for him, and may help him cope with the dour reality he finds himself in, which I consider to be an absolute necessity for him. I long to see David the lead engineer, not David the divorced and depressed dad. As I find myself saying more and more these days, like all good things, this too shall come with time. A concern was brought up about how interacting with Sabbatical may affect David's mental health, but this is a concern that would be best resolved with both the captain and David (possibly Klerica as well). I intend to do this at the earliest possible convenience.
Klerica is a rather studious individual that is fresh out of college, with grades that were top of her class. However, she has no practical experience, and on a ship like ''this?'' Well, books on contemporary theory may as well be futuristic fantasy. Nonetheless, she still seems motivated to learn, and needs work experience. She has been hired as a crewman, and will most likely be a de-facto apprentice to David, as anything else would be a complete waste of her skillset and knowledge.
Other notable applicants include a narcoleptic and incredibly senile old dwarf whose senses fail him, both in the mental interpretation and in the sensory interpretation. Oh, and Snoot too.
===== The Position of Cook =====
The position of cook was given to an ogre by the name of Bob. Bob is a gentle giant (pun intended) with a heart of gold, and he deserves as much happiness as this world can procure for him. If memory serves, he was a cook at his family's restaurant, but decided to come here for some reason instead. That exact reason, I forget. Nonetheless, Bob was selected because he will be a stabilizing individual, and such a thing is always necessary in our current situation.
Other notable applicants include a wasteful professional chef with a short temper that was primarily rejected on the premise that she would be a destabilizing individual, a construct that was rather effective at making meals, and, of course, Snoot.
===== The Position of Navigator =====
The navigator role was given to Bink, a Kenku that cannot speak except via repeating words she hears. She can write though. She was determined to be the best choice because the other applicants were a comically slow Tortle and someone that I can only assume to be a serial thief. Snoot applied too, of course, but when asked to draw a map, he drew a smiley face instead.
===== Snoot =====
Now for Snoot. It's Sneeze, but with a gun. I'll say nothing else of him, as doing so would make your conceptualization of him in your mind significantly less accurate than it would be to simply leave my description of him at that. He was hired as crewman, as he would be a danger to wider society if left unemployed, and he is unfit for any more important role, despite applying for all of them.
[[Category:Player Characters]]
[[Category:Player Characters]]
[[Category:Wicked Wilds]]
[[Category:Wicked Wilds]]
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