== "All My Friends are Dead" ==
All My Friends are Dead
All My Friends are Dead
It's a hundred years in the future
and all my friends are trees
The Ballad of Andif
This is an unofficial ditty that swept through certain circles in Laergul, the college of music in Jewelspar, shortly after Andif's return (See Interlude: The Problem with Scrying). It praises her name and references a few stories spread about or by her. The spontaneous and somewhat irreverent tone of the ballad captures some of the spirit of the bard, even if it lacks depth.
Verse 1:
Student of Lucian, flutist of Laergul,
She snuck in a lover and ran from this school.
Refrain:
Andif the elf
Is truly top shelf.
Listen to her or else
You might shit yourself
Verse 2:
With her renowned brown note, she'll strike you with Fear.
She frightens her foes and inspires her peers.
Refrain
Verse 3:
Don't call her a Lyre - she disguises her flaws.
She thrives with a beard or a day at the spa.
Refrain
Bridge:
And when we thought we'd heard from her last
She returned with her Bandif, and we're having a blast.
Refrain
Andif the bard
The best in our backyard
And if you ever leave us,
Send us a postcard.
And if you ever leave,
Send us a postcard.
And if you ever leave,
Send us a postcard.
"The Ballad of Kel" (Asar Partui)
Awoke in his chamber
He yawned with a sigh
Awoke in the night to meet Asar Partui
I'll give you one choice.
"you've come to me, why?"
Were the words of the man who beat Asar Partui
Give me what you've taken
"Are you talking to I?"
Were the words of the man who beat Asar Partui
You've taken my money!
"Oh no sir you lie"
Were the words of the man who beat Asar Partui
He said bow before me
"Oh I'd rather die"
Were the words of the man who beat Asar Partui
And so with a leap
He would take to the sky
And duel on the docks with that Asar Partui
A flourish, a twirl
And in the blink of an eye
He stood as the victor over Asar Partui!
"The Day Saving Fey"
Every 10 years they say that there comes a great day
Where the meek will inherit and win
In the new world we live and that day it would give
A hero who won over a great beast of sin
She called herself Eve, and she would then leave
The people of Delvin with a memory
Of her triumph and battle, her ground shaking rattle
When the giant was slain and felled like a tree
So it goes then to shows if you're smaller than foes
You can beat them with your clever tricks
A goblin (yarrr) a puppy (arrrf) a catfolk (Rawr) a guppy (blub)
A gnome (hee hee hee) or a hobbit (yawwwwwn) or even a Pix! (Eve!)
Before He Cheats
Hit country song written, produced, and performed by Elvira and Straw.
