Shade

The Seventh Tail

This story is true.

Turn and greet your demons before they have the chance to turn into shadows. He was told as much by the elder with dark claws and a glare carved from black clouds. “The Path we take will make you its puppet if you walk it without remembering you are already mad.” And then she made him dance with lightning until he stopped wondering how long they had been gone.

My Kouga,

You should know that you never needed me. You wanted me. And that’s worth a great deal in its own right, but there’s a difference. Needing someone implies death in their absence. You yet live and live with purpose befitting your title. I will admit that I sometimes still think of you as that bright little spark of lava that could never cool down. I still think of you. I still think of that time when we met on the hill and made lava and lightning blend under the full moon. I still think of lying together after the caern rite. Sakura-sama once told me Doshi are always fated for heartbreak. I thought she was wrong. I don’t know if I’ve changed my mind. I often have to ask why I refused to write you back. I usually tell myself it would have been pointless: that you would have burned anything I sent back. Maybe it’s that I just couldn’t bear to be the one waiting. You know I’ve never been fair. Seeing you again gives me hope that should be reserved for the Earth Mother and her alone. I’m not sorry about what I did, but I am sorry I never explained myself. I shook the hand of The Man of Many Tails, it’s true. And I let him tell me all manner of terrible secrets. And I let him revel in his memories of killing our families. And I let him give me one of his tails. But so long as I meet with him twice a year and I keep his tail, he can never attack any kitsune again. You may tell me I’ve sold my soul. I don’t know that I’d disagree with you. But I’ve never been fair. That’s evidenced by the fact that you may never receive this letter. If you do, and you decide you can’t stomach me, I’ll leave. If you decide you can, know that I’ve always wanted you as much as you want me.

Yours,

Seiji